Eight irritating ways America has ruined this World Cup
ATLANTA — The Americans weren’t ever going to let the opportunity pass. Football is steeped in tradition, everywhere but here. Carte blanche.
Soccer is gaining in popularity by the second in the United States. And with pride in one’s home inescapable in the land of the free, the opportunity to educate the world in the American way was always going to be impossible to resist.
Whether the Americanisation of the World Cup is intentional or not, it is inescapable.
American national anthem, no matter who is playing

It does not quite leave as sour a taste as the Saudi Arabia national anthem being played out at Wembley during the boxing, but when we are asked to stand for “The Star-Spangled Banner” an hour before kick-off, often to a near-empty stadium, we are simply left asking “why”?
What place does the US anthem have ahead of an encounter between two teams from the other side of the world?
The audacity of the stadium announcers to instruct people to stand for it only adds to the impudence of it all. God bless America.
Those blasted hydration breaks
Even the Canadians booed. Hydration breaks are perhaps understandable in 35-degree heat, but in air-conditioned stadiums with the roof closed?
What they cram into those three minutes tells you all you need to know about the real motives. Like a sped-up Super Bowl half-time show, twice per game.
The flow of the match is the real loser in all of this. Any team that is on top immediately has the momentum sapped out of them when forced to stop for three minutes – which is kind of what any game plan contrives to conjure in the first place.
Make. Some. Noise and countdown to kick-off
We are one step away from kiss-cam stealing the show. Perhaps the Premier League could benefit from competitions to measure the noise generated by supporters of each team? Or would riots ensue? How partisan would the judges be?
Panning to the crowd in American sport and urging spectators to dance works – some good old family fun. When England fans were picked out in Boston, their time in the spotlight was short-lived, given their choice of gesture.
One Americanism that does make you wince are those countdowns to kick-off, like we are bringing in the New Year around Sydney Harbour. Rather than any fireworks being let off, the whole spectacle doesn’t work when upon the countdown climax, Declan Rice passes the ball all the way back to the goalkeeper.
Picking out stars of other sports mid-match
Imagine sitting in Old Trafford and Luke Littler appears on the big screen, looking rather uncomfortable as he waves for a period of time longer than he ever has had to before, while the crowd goes wilder than at any other point in the match.
Over here, the stadium screens regularly pick out NFL or NBA stars, which startles us foreign reporters, given we often have no idea who they are.
Can’t they be left to watch the greatest sporting spectacle on earth in peace?
Jingoistic stadium announcers

Stadium announcers here all sound exactly like Michael Buffer, without the hyperbole. Do they all go to the same language school and yodel until they can opine Let’s Get Ready to Rumble in that unmistakable chutzpah?
And you just know they have paid very little attention to the things that really matter, like getting players’ names right.
Let’s hope Noni Madueke was not listening to his starting berth being revealed for England’s opener, the proudest moment of his career, when the AT&T Stadium compere got into all kinds of trouble.
Fans sitting together a risky game?
I know Netherlands versus Japan is hardly Millwall against West Ham, but have Fifa become too American and completely forgotten about any form of segregation between supporters?
One set of supporters sit at one end and the others opposite.
Imagine if England and Russian supporters had been seated side by side in Marseille? And does it not just look better – this is your end and that ours? This is soccer, people.
Everything is massive
It is just so unnecessary. We know size matters in America more than anything, with football supporters not left out of their penchant for the gargantuan.
Big screens in stadiums are cinema size and tempt you into gazing lovingly at them rather than the pitch down below. Bars on concourses have mini-stadium seating next to them. Parking lots stretch further than the eye can see.
The inspiration behind the AT&T Stadium wasn’t the Maracana or the Nou Camp, but the Pyramids. The biggest structure Americans could think of, of course.
Read more
- Kevin Garside: The World Cup has exposed all of Thomas Tuchel’s flaws
- Daniel Storey: German football is a bin fire – only one man can save them
Popcorn smell overwhelms
In Spain, it’s pipas and marijuana. In Germany it’s wheat beer. In the US, it’s popcorn.
The smell of World Cup stadiums over here evokes memories of family trips to Disney World, where any enclosed space reeked of popcorn.
The hot food prices over here are so eyewatering you can’t blame the locals for filling up on a cinema’s staple snack. Is there a smell more American than that?
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