November 2023

As a big-money Manchester United signing, you are always going to be under the utmost scrutiny. Throw in the fact Andre Onana is a goalkeeper, replacing a stalwart who kept United afloat for so long, and the pressure cooker was turned up to its maximum setting.

High-profile errors in key fixtures earlier this season led United to rally around the under-fire ‘keeper, issuing unwavering support to dispel any doubts that Onana is the rightful heir to David de Gea’s throne.

And it worked. In recent weeks, as United have, by hook or by crook, become the Premier League’s form team. Onana had not put a foot wrong, growing in stature with the ball at his feet, all while making big saves at crucial moments.

But after he single-handedly contrived to make United’s best performance of the season in Galatasaray irrelevant, to leave Erik ten Hag’s side staring down the barrel of a European exit, it is very much back to square one.

The manager who put so much faith in his former Ajax protégé needs to make some tough decisions, for the good of all concerned.

“He’s OK,” Ten Hag said after United’s gripping, slapstick 3-3 draw in Istanbul. “It is not about individuals. Individual errors in football can make a difference and you take responsibility for it, but it is always about the team.”

Blind faith is not going to wash this time. Onana needs taking out of the firing line.

Fortunately for Ten Hag, he has the perfect excuse to shuffle his goalkeeping pack.

i understands Onana, having come out of international retirement, is considering going to the Africa Cup of Nations in January.

Should he choose to do so, he could miss up to seven United matches, thrusting understudy Altay Bayindir into the limelight, despite having not played a single minute since joining.

Before a run of games which could make or break United’s fragile season, the Turkey international could so with some match practice – if only the guy ahead of him was floundering and in need of salvation.

Publicly, Ten Hag can tell the world his plan is to give Bayindir some minutes, should he be needed more regularly in January. Even if we all know the real reason.

More on Man Utd

Whatever Ten Hag says, after the final whistle in Istanbul there was a truer reflection of how the other players feel about their beleaguered colleague.

After his costly blunders against Bayern Munich where, just as they did in Copenhagen and Istanbul, United scored three away goals and still didn’t win, Onana cut a disconsolate figure at full time. At the end of those games, however, he did not have to wallow in self-pity for too long – he soon had several team-mates offering a shoulder to cry on.

There were no such actions – infinitely more powerful than any words to the media – in Turkey.

An exhilarating team performance, in such a hostile environment, does not come around too often.

United danced on the hot coals of the Ali Sami Yen inferno, bringing the “hell” themselves on their return to Galatasaray 30 years on from one of the Champions League’s most infamous nights. The visitors were cruising at 2-0 after two superb goals. It could have been more.

What the hosts needed was a goal out of nothing to lift the crowd. Chelsea loanee Hakim Ziyech didn’t even hit a first-half free-kick particularly well – in fact, his attempt arrowed straight down the middle of Onana’s goal, a trajectory the Cameroonian failed to read.

There were several heart-in-mouth moments before the incident that took the match, and their hopes of reaching the knockout stages, out of United’s hands. The cameraman picked it up, as every replay shown in the stadium lingered on Ziyech before he stepped up to take the second free-kick, emphasising his nod to team-mates that he was going for goal.

Again, the strike was not particularly well hit. Again, however, the technique deserted Onana, as he tried to scoop the fizzing effort away with one hand. The results were catastrophic.

United had been cruising at 3-1. Had Onana palmed Ziyech’s second goal away, Galatasaray did not look like they had it in them to revive the match themselves.

Confidence among goalkeepers is a fragile thing – and as his team-mates basked in the vitriol, Onana wilted.



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There is a new fashion on social media, that when someone young in sport achieves something of note, those of us of a certain age rush to make a reference point linking the sportsperson’s date of birth with a cultural reference that our peers will understand.

You’ll instantly recognise an example: “Winner X was born after the launch of the PlayStation 3”.

What we’re really saying is: “Doesn’t the mind play tricks and oh god we’re all getting old, time is accelerating towards us like a speeding truck.”

Anyway, onto business: Lewis Miley was born after Alan Shearer’s last appearance for Newcastle United and he’s now apparently old enough to hold his own away to Paris Saint-Germain. I know, awful isn’t it.

Except that Miley isn’t old enough, obviously. He only signed his first professional contract six months ago. He has started four senior matches. He is a boy with a boy’s face. It’s a good job that Newcastle put him on the back row for their pre-match team photo in Paris, or you might have mistaken him for a mascot.

The most arresting aspect of watching excellent, extremely young footballers playing in first teams is the maturity of their decision making. To an extent, you expect the dashes of pace and twinkle-toed skill; every elite academy produces technical footballers because England has undergone a development revolution over the last decade.

But the intangible stuff – that’s a different beast entirely. Look at the way Miley drops back when Bruno Guimaraes and Joelinton have both pushed up. See how his fake run, never in hope of receiving the ball, opened up space in the build-up to Alexander Isak’s goal in Paris. Watch how he has three passing options and tends to pick the right one every time.

This may all sound like overkill, unnecessarily reaching for praise. To which we would say: yes, you’re probably right. But did we mention that he’s 17 years old? What were you doing at 17, eh? Actually, don’t answer that.

If we try to process all this, it’s worth saying that there are few better teams out there to walk into as a young pup. There is a team spirit, resilience and general movement of good vibes around Newcastle United that makes a kid beg for a part in the party.

Paris Saint-Germain's French forward #07 Kylian Mbappe (R) vies with Newcastle United's English midfielder #67 Lewis Miley (L) during the UEFA Champions League 1st round, day 5, Group F football match between Paris Saint-Germain (PSG) and Newcastle United on November 28, 2023 at the Parc des Princes stadium in Paris. Football: (Photo by FRANCK FIFE / AFP) (Photo by FRANCK FIFE/AFP via Getty Images)
Facing Kylian Mbappe (R) at just 17 was the stuff of dreams for Miley (Photo: Getty)

Around Miley, Joelinton runs like an enthusiastic Labrador and Guimaraes protects the ball as if it is his only possession. There is beauty and brains and brawn to help you settle in.

Little of this has come by design, and certainly not at this speed. Newcastle’s Champions League campaign has brought with it great promise of what they might achieve during future springs, but it has also meant overtime for club physios who are dealing with an unprecedented backlog. Eddie Howe is without 14 senior players and would evidently have preferred more at his reach.

Miley was always rated, one of those youngsters who gets academy coaches nattering to their senior colleagues over steaming cups of milky tea at the side of pitches.

There is a reason why he wasn’t loaned out this summer, and was withdrawn from England’s Under-17 European Championship campaign in May. Miley came on for his debut against Chelsea instead, Howe wanting him around. But it was never meant to come to this, not 90 minutes in Paris in November.

But is that not how distant dreams come true? Ask Marcus Rashford, who only got his debut because of an injury crisis exacerbated by Anthony Martial getting injured in the warm-up. Every academy player relies partly upon their talent and partly on happy happenstance and minor tweaks of fate. This could all have come too quickly for Miley. But when you prove yourself ready to welcome your chance as if it were the most natural step, you have merited fate falling your way.

There are no guarantees for Miley now. The list of the 15 youngest English appearance makers in the Champions League (with him at No 6) contains Stefan O’Connor (now a medical negligence paralegal and start-up investor) and Jude Bellingham (now at Real Madrid) and most things in between.

Potential is both everything and nothing all at once, a full cup and an empty shell depending on what comes next.

But boy, the boy has talent. They have known this for a while, first in Stanley and then at Darsley Park and now across Newcastle. And for all your billions and state owners, it is those bright-eyed academy kids like Miley who evaporate the concerns about the creep of homogeneity. That only makes him doubly special.



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Arsenal 6-0 Lens (Havertz 13′, Jesus 21′, Saka 23′, Martinelli 27′, Odegaard 45+1, Jorginho pen 86′))

EMIRATES STADIUM — Arsenal booked their place in the Champions League knockout stages for the first time in seven years and did so in style as they thrashed Lens 6-0.

The Gunners only needed a point to progress but victory means top spot is guaranteed and they can now rest weary legs in their final group game away at PSV Eindhoven in two weeks’ time.

It was under-fire Kai Havertz who opened the scoring, before the whole forward line got involved, Gabriel Jesus, Bukayo Saka and then Gabriel Martinelli with the pick of the goals, giving the Gunners a four-goal lead inside 30 minutes.

Captain Martin Odegaard became the fifth different goalscorer in first-half stoppage time, a Champions League record before the break, before substitute Jorginho completed the rout with an 86th-minute penalty.

Arsenal player ratings

David Raya: Was notably direct with his feet after weeks of criticism about his passing, but had very little to do with his hands 6

Takehiro Tomiyasu: Sprayed a perfect cross-field pass to Martinelli to send him away to score the fourth, and he added a second assist in first-half stoppage time, a fine cut-back to find the captain on the volley 8

William Saliba: Not an obvious night for critiquing Arsenal’s defence but the livewire Elye Wahi did leave Saliba standing on more than one occasion, and in different circumstances could have been a real headache 6

Gabriel Magalhaes: Little to do. Hard to fault. Amusing effort to fire up the crowd again after making a late block 7

Oleksandr Zinchenko: Deft early ball over the top gave Jesus the first chance of the match but the Brazilian could not hit the target. Was given the night off at half-time 7

Martin Odegaard: Arrived at the perfect time to connect with a Tomiyasu cross and make it five before half-time. Might have been a candidate for an early shower but, after an injury and illness-blighted few weeks, perhaps wanted to make a statement about his own fitness 7

We have to prioritise who to rest and as well he hasn’t accumulated that many minutes in the last six or seven weeks. So we asked him how he was, he was fine and he managed himself a bit in the second half and he was fine.

Arsenal manager Mikel Arteta

Declan Rice: Read Lens’s counter-attacks well in the early stages, snuffing out danger before it really took light. Was a spectator once the game was won after half an hour, apart from one marauding run deep into Lens territory – at which point he got a little lost 7

Kai Havertz: Hard to read too much into an opportunistic strike against a feeble opposition, but goals breed confidence, a currency Havertz desperately needs. After the winner against Brentford, his back-to-back appearances with non-penalty goals for 31 games 8

Bukayo Saka: It was his mazy run that led to Jesus scoring Arsenal’s second but he knew very little about his seventh goal of the season, a parried shot that went in off his left hip. Right place, right time though and also given a much-needed rest after 65 minutes. Five years to the day since his debut, he is now irreplaceable at Arsenal 7

I’ll never forget that day. It was a cold day like this. I’ve gone through a lot on and off the pitch since then.

Arsenal winger Bukayo Saka

Gabriel Jesus: Competed better to win a second ball and create the first goal, and then showed no rust when fainting to send Kevin Danso onto his backside and then planting the finish past Brice Samba to score his first goal for a month 9

Gabriel Martinelli: Drove at the defence in trademark fashion before his shot was saved, leading to the third goal, and the Lens defenders did not learn their lesson when he was allowed to cut in on his right foot again and score 9

Arsenal substitutes

Jakub Kiwior: A valuable chance to spend 45 pressure-free minutes learning the Zinchenko hybrid role, in midfield with the ball and at full-back without it 7

Ben White: Starting to look like a genuine competition for the right-back spot, with Tomiyasu deputising with aplomb whenever asked to do so. White perhaps needs to show more going forward as his fellow full-back starts to impress more with that side of his game 6

Reiss Nelson: Might have expected to get on at half-time rather than just getting 25 minutes at the end 6

Jorginho: Sat nicely in front of the defence but is not, clearly, Declan Rice. Bagged his first Arsenal goal from the penalty spot courtesy of Odegaard’s generosity 7

Eddie Nketiah: Came on with less than 10 minutes to go n/a

Beyond Arteta’s dreams

Mikel Arteta says he “didn’t even dream” of beating Lens 6-0 and winning Group B with a game to spare.

The Gunners will be seeded in December’s last-16 draw, in which Arteta’s side find themselves for the first time since the Arsene Wenger era.

“We’ve done it in a very convincing way against a really good side and I think the team right from the beginning showed a lot of aggression and determination to go for the game,” Arteta said.

“Everything happened in the right way, especially in the first 30 minutes and that was really helpful to win the game.”

Only eight weeks ago, Arsenal were beaten 2-1 away home by the same French side, who have lost just one of their last 12 games and been miserly at the back, conceding just six goals in that time.

But Arteta insisted Arsenal were not out for revenge, but had learned from their mistakes on that October night.

“Defeat gives you a lot of things to think about and take the learnings from from that,” Arteta added.

“Credit to them, they are a really good side. They are extremely well coached and they make life very, very difficult for you but today we were really effective.”



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Galatasaray 3-3 Manchester United (Ziyech 29′, 62′, Akturkoglu 71′ | Garnacho 11′, Fernandes 18′, McTominay 55′)

RAMS PARK — For the neutral, and especially rival supporters, few things bring more pleasure than Manchester United this season.

They have brought out all the hits. There have been record-breaking losing streaks, embarrassing ineptitude and endless snatching of defeats from the jaws of victories. Their latest rebrand saw them become slapstick European entertainers.

In a match they really had to win to give themselves a chance of reaching the knockout stages, United played some of their best attacking football of the season, raining in 18 shots at the Galatasaray goal, away from home, scoring three goals – a tally that should be enough to beat the Turkish champions.

Yet, goalkeeping howlers and calamitous defending ensured there was no need for the canned laughter to fill any dead spaces. United led 2-0 and 3-1 and still, somehow, managed to take home one point. They have scored 12 goals and remain bottom of their Champions League group – Manchester United really are the gift that keeps on giving.

“It was enjoyable to watch. We were dynamic, brave and scored great goals,” Erik ten Hag said. “Even after we had setbacks, we kept going and should have won.

“We need to manage games better. We will learn from that.”

Not when it is this fun, Erik. We nearly didn’t have a game at all. The rain in Istanbul made Manchester look like the Gobi Desert pre-match, but after the match officials had previous looked concerned, as kick-off neared, the rain ceased – let the games begin.

While the modern-day Ali Sami Yen Stadium may look a look more imposing than its predecessor, the atmosphere inside resembles more of a modern-day cauldron – plenty of noise but players not fearing for their safety.

The pre-match tifo message was, of course, very much on brand as the hosts welcomed United back to “hell”, opening the scars from that famous night in 1993 when Eric Cantona lost his head and Bryan Robson was missing some blood.

Manchester United's Bruno Fernandes appears dejected during the UEFA Champions League Group A match at RAMS Park, Istanbul. Picture date: Wednesday November 29, 2023. PA Photo. See PA story SOCCER Man Utd. Photo credit should read: Nick Potts/PA Wire. RESTRICTIONS: Use subject to restrictions. Editorial use only, no commercial use without prior consent from rights holder.
Bruno Fernandes appears dejected after Man Utd threw away a 3-1 lead (Photo: PA)

The whistles that greeted every United touch were piercing, but they were soon silenced in a blistering United start.

First of all, man, well boy, of the hour, Alejandro Garnacho, followed his Goal of the Season shoo-in at the weekend with another fine finish in the 11th minute, before Bruno Fernandes arrowed home the very definition of a bolt from the blue – the xG from where he wound back that right foot from was 0.02.

Even though they had led two previous group games and ended up losing, a much-improved United surely couldn’t mess it up from here.

They seemed to be in fact relishing the Turkish spite. For both goals, Garnacho and Fernandes taunted the home supporters and were pelted with all manner of missiles, with just a pig’s head missing from the repertoire.

This United side, however, for all their improvement, like the owners of a new puppy from the pound, still find it very difficult to hold onto leads.

Andre Onana has been markedly more dependable of late, but while his teammates revelled in the searing inferno, the United stopper was melting before our eyes.

Firstly, he was too easily wrong-footed by a Hakim Ziyech free-kick to get the hosts back in it. Then, after Scott McTominay had taken his season tally to five, Ziyech, the only home player aware of Onana’s suffering, fizzed another set piece into the Cameroonian’s body and you know the rest.

The hosts were dead and buried at 3-1, but after Onana’s latest misdemeanour, the crowd rose and sucked home an equaliser with 19 minutes to go, Kerem Akturkoglu taking advantage of a visiting backline that parted like the Red Sea.

In this frankly bonkers match, every attack resulted in a chance. The Keystone Cops defending was a joy to behold. You just didn’t want it to end. Fernandes struck a post while substitute Facundo Pellestri should have won it at the death.

It wasn’t to be, leaving United’s fate down to the last game, where they need to beat Bayern Munich, while maintaining one eye on other results to even secure a Europa League spot. Guffawing all round.

One man won’t be finding this as amusing. Ten Hag’s thrill seekers have conceded 33 goals this season, the most in their opening 20 matches since 1962-63, while they have been breached 14 times in the Champions League, their most ever in a single group stage.

Popcorn at the ready for two weeks’ time.



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It was a draw that felt like a defeat, but late in the night at the Parc des Princes a defiant Kieran Trippier was not in the mood for despair.

Newcastle United left Paris on Tuesday night nursing a sense of injustice but having kept themselves in the Champions League – and their heads in the process.

They made their point – the Tino Livramento handball decision was extraordinary and yet another black mark against an increasingly difficult to defend VAR system – but did not linger on it.

That suggests that when the debate subsides, they will be able to emerge a stronger side as they confront a fixture list with no letting up.

There is less than a fortnight before Newcastle’s Champions League decider against AC Milan – if they better Paris Saint-Germain’s result at group leaders Borussia Dortmund they go through – but in that time they play another three Premier League fixtures, against Manchester United, Everton and Tottenham. Defiance will leave them better equipped than dwelling on it.

It is understood that stressing the need to keep their dignity while other teams have lost theirs over VAR decisions – Mikel Arteta’s St James’ Park rant springs to mind – was a collective decision taken in the dressing room and Trippier was the perfect messenger. Whatever private anger there was did not boil over.

“I just try to enjoy football and I’m just tired of discussing these matters, if you’re on the end of it in a good way or a bad way, nothing can change it,” he said, asked to pass comment on VAR and its impact on the game.

Don’t get it twisted, there was disbelief at the decision to penalise Livramento – “What is he supposed to do in that position?” – but he feels football needs a step change in how it approaches refereeing decisions.

Trippier said Newcastle’s players had tried to extract from referee Szymon Marciniak why he gave the injury-time spot kick but got no explanation. Then he proceeded to propose a more radical solution to the issue.

“It’s one of those where I’m standing here, discussing the decisions but why can’t officials?” he asked.

“Why can’t the referee come out and explain why he gave that penalty, for example, just to give all the supporters, the media, yourselves a more clear indication of why he gave the penalty?

Trippier says the referee refused to explain the VAR decision (Photo: Getty)
Trippier says the referee refused to explain the VAR decision (Photo: Getty)

“Players get stuck here and answer questions, but why can’t officials? It doesn’t get spoken about enough.”

He has a point. Marciniak is the best in the business – the World Cup referee for the classic final almost a year ago between France and Argentina – and his first instinct to overrule desperate Parisian appeals for a penalty was correct. VAR spotted contact with the hand via the hip and asked him to check. He then made what consensus suggests was the wrong call.

Asking him why he changed his mind, and listening to the explanation, might help expose the farce that VAR actually helps officials rather than over-complicating the game.

It is a shame that it emerges as the biggest talking point when there was so much in the game, and Newcastle’s performance, to enjoy.

Trippier was outstanding against Mbappe – the France forward can hardly enjoy his meetings with the England full-back – but so too was Miguel Almiron and Lewis Miley. In goal Nick Pope, a rare 8/10 mark in the notoriously stingy L’Equipe newspaper on Wednesday a testament to his display, was simply outstanding.

“So many positives,” Trippier said.

“We didn’t make one sub, it was 11 against 16 tonight. The lads have given absolutely everything, as I’ve said over and over again. We’ve all just got to keep stepping up.

“We’ve all got to keep giving everything for the team and wait for some players to come back from injury.”

Trippier agreed that Newcastle, after successive games where they gave diet versions of Eddie Howe’s high intensity blueprint, finally illustrated what they could do on Europe’s biggest stage.

He highlighted “character”, “togetherness” and made the case that Newcastle’s European education was coming on apace.

“When you come to places like Paris Saint-Germain you have to frustrate teams. I always go back to when I was at Atletico going to play Liverpool at Anfield, we got absolutely peppered, but we got through so sometimes you’ve got to manage the game,” he said.

“I think we did that. I thought we managed the game unbelievably well.

“Some people may not like it, but we still tried to go after them on the counter, which worked first half – we played unbelievably well. But you have to find ways to win matches.”



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Towards the end of last season, something remarkable happened to Crystal Palace under Roy Hodgson: they started having quite a lot of fun.

Patrick Vieira had once been the marker of a bright new future, but his possessional doctrine had given way to tepid compromise and, eventually, defensive uncertainty.

Hodgson as the old dog learning new tricks? This one was juggling knives while breakdancing. Palace scored five at Leeds United and four at home to West Ham. That accounted for a fifth of their league goals all season.

Hodgson received the bulk of the credit for the transformation. No serious arguments there: managers routinely get the grief when things go wrong. The reappointment of a 76-year-old was, unsurprisingly, not celebrated as a progressive leap, but Hodgson brought the spring clean to Selhurst Park. He proved us wrong.

In hindsight, two things were happening beyond Hodgson’s control and for his benefit. Firstly, Palace’s fixture list turned sharply in the old-new manager’s favour: the five league wins came against the three relegated clubs, Bournemouth and a West Ham side who had emphatically prioritised European competition.

Also, Michael Olise and Eberechi Eze were both present for each of Hodgson’s 10 league games having started two games together in the previous three months due to issues of selection and fitness.

Suddenly Palace had attacking intrigue. Suddenly Wilfried Zaha couldn’t be double-marked. Suddenly Hodgson the pragmatist was persuaded to make life easiest for the strongest aspect of his team.

Related: Saturday was the first time this season that Eze and Olise started a game together and Eze went off injured (and may miss several weeks). So it comes as no surprise that Palace have become emphatically dull once again. Those green shoots of spring were nothing but a mirage, a fading vision of an unambitious dream: a team that routinely scores more than a goal per game.

In the last seven completed seasons, Palace have finished between 11th and 14th in the Premier League. During the decade since promotion, Palace have achieved a points total between 41 and 49, the Premier League’s bottom-half comfort zone. They have occasionally flirted with trouble and offered hope of a top-half surge – “Oh, the joy – we cannot cope!”.

But Crystal Palace’s energy is stronger than such trivial matters as form and fortune. They end up where they always end up.

There are actors within this club, perhaps even the majority of their leadership, who will be perfectly content with such consistency. You take your seat at the table and you collect your broadcasting revenue chips.

Cheick Doucoure was stretchered off during the defeat to Luton Town (Photo: Getty)
Cheick Doucoure was stretchered off during the defeat to Luton Town (Photo: Getty)

At the last formal count (2021-22 season), Palace had the 15th highest revenue in the Premier League and the 11th highest wage bill. And they finish…between 11th and 15th. If you sit quiet and pay your bills, make amends to avoid the deepest pitfalls of managerial incompetence and correct your inevitable mistakes, you’re happy.

In their defence, if there ever was a time to appreciate league table stagnancy, it would be now. Two years ago, Palace had the oldest team in the Premier League and vowed to reduce it. That creates an inescapable process: older players leave for low fees or no fees to get rid of the wages.

Since selling Aaron Wan-Bissaka in June 2019, Palace have sold only two players for transfer fees: Alexander Sorloth (for around £15m) and Christian Benteke (for around £4m).

When middling clubs lose squad depth without recompense, the financial wiggle room to replace them evaporates and thus the club is left to take hopeful punts on potential. Since the start of last summer, Palace have bought six players for fees. Cheick Doucoure has been a roaring success (and he’s now injured for several months). The rest – Chris Richards, Dean Henderson, Rob Holding, Matheus Franca and Naouirou Ahamada – have only one combined league start this season.

But there is an easy way to relieve stagnancy. The young players you do sign are permitted to make mistakes and learn on the job and in the team. You try to give those who spend an increasingly higher proportion of their income traipsing across the country after you something to get excited about. You do not reflect the rise in apathy and atrophy back to the supporters through your own performance.

Eberechi Eze suffered an injury against Luton Town (Photo: Getty)
Eberechi Eze has also been ruled out for a number of weeks (Photo: Getty)

The Premier League may be an economic behemoth, but very little of the marketing bumf shows you watching from the away stand at Kenilworth Road as your team loses while playing risk-averse football.

It is tempting to focus on the minutiae here. After all, that is all you can change easily: sack the manager (so say reports), appoint someone with another different style (Steve Cooper or Kieran McKenna have both been mooted), hope to provide enough distraction for long enough to persuade people to keep buying season tickets.

That has become Palace’s pattern: Sam Allardyce left with the club in 14th, Hodgson left with them in 14th, Vieira left with them in 12th and they are now 13th.

But that minutiae is itself the distraction. The truth is far less appetising: an existential crisis about what a football club means and who it services. At its most hyperbolic, it broadly draws a line between existence and life and asks an awkward question for Crystal Palace supporters about which they are currently experiencing. Some would give you depressing answers.

You see this cycle is destined to repeat because it always repeats. Either Palace will win one of their next two games and take an unexpected point against a bigger club, ease the pressure on Hodgson and we’ll have this same discussion again in two months’ time. Or they won’t, Hodgson will be sacked and we’ll be here in two years’ time with someone else. It’s not that we’ve been here before; it’s that we’ve never been anywhere else.

Palace are like the child at the grown-up house party hosted by their parents, hiding out of view to avoid being sent to bed and missing all the fun. Except that sitting quietly in one place behind the sofa arm isn’t actually enjoyable at all, because you are simply witnessing fun rather than partaking in it.

That represents the worst of Premier League fan culture. You are told to be thankful for mediocrity, grateful for that single away point at a Big Six club that comes once in hardly ever. You are told that fun is risky because it may be a prelude only for disappointment.

Your team can’t take a chance because if it goes wrong then you lose your golden egg. And you spend thousands of pounds and hundreds of hours just to feel guilty just for wanting to feel anything at all.

Glad all over? They’d take a single limb right now.



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Man City 2-2 RB Leipzig (Haaland 54′, Foden 70′, Alvarez 87′ | Openda 13′, 33′)

ETIHAD STADIUM — Pep Guardiola’s double substitution of Jeremy Doku and Julian Alvarez turned the tide of a victory that clinched top place in the group for holders Manchester City.

Goals from Erling Haaland and Phil Foden had cancelled out two first-half efforts from Lois Openda, before Alvarez converted Foden’s 87th minute cross to maintain his side’s extraordinary home record in Europe.

Not since Lyon won at the Etihad in September 2018 have City lost in front of their own fans in the Champions League, a run of 29 games – only two of them draws.

But, until Guardiola’s 54th minute double substitution, it was a close-run thing.

Openda struck twice in the opening 33 minutes, sending City plummeting into the unfamiliar territory of trailing by two goals at home in Europe.

Not since Barcelona inflicted a 2-0 defeat on Manuel Pellegrini’s City in February 2014 had a European team won by that kind of margin at the Etihad but the Belgian international had his team dreaming.

Both goals were the result of catastrophic defending that had an agitated Guardiola furiously scribbling in his notebook and ordering Nathan Ake to warm up on the touchline.

After 12 minutes, a long punt forward from keeper Janis Blaswich was badly misjudged by Manuel Akanji, allowing the speedy Openda to run through and beat Stefan Oretga with a perfect finish into the far corner.

And City were still coming to terms with that setback when the Belgian international doubled the lead.

This time, defender Ruben Dias was the culprit, diving in to challenge Openda just inside the Leipzig half as he gathered a pass from Xavi Simons.

The youngster skilfully turned the City man and sped half the length of the field, Dias trailing in his wake, before delivering another superb finish.

It appeared Dias might be contending with an injury, a notion confirmed when Ake took his place for the start of the second half, although it was another City sub who helped Haaland start the fightback.

Alvarez, with virtually his first touch, found Foden and his well-weighted through ball sent Haaland clean through to convert his 19th goal of the season.

It ended a frustrating evening for Haaland who had missed at least three decent first half openings which he would have been expected to convert.

After all, the City number nine had needed just 35 minutes to score five times against Leipzig at the Etihad in a 7-0 thrashing last season but he, and his team, are still some way short of their treble-winning best.

But no team since Brentford, a little over 12 months ago, had won at the Etihad and Everton and Liverpool, four days ago, the only sides to even escape with a draw since.

Man of the match: Lois Openda

Based on his two first half goals, the Belgian international looks like being the next big money sale off the Leipzig production line.

Alvarez’s free-kick might have led to an expected equaliser, after 68 minutes, but Ake headed wide from eight yards.

And just a minute later, Foden succeeded where his teammate had failed, collecting a short, sharp pass from Josko Gvardiol and calmly converting from a dozen yards.

Fabio Carvalho, on loan from Liverpool, had the ball in the City net soon after, but saw his effort ruled out for offside.



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Alejandro Garnacho will always have Goodison Park. His goal against Everton cast him in a state of permanent suspension, forever frozen upside down. Like George Best weaving through the Sheffield United defence, Bobby Charlton’s howitzer at Anfield, Garnacho has his eternal symbol of the time he was a Manchester United baller.

It was a riotous moment of instinctive brilliance that was beyond even the player to comprehend. A sequence of automatic triggers along the neural pathway and onto his right boot, divined to intercept the ball in midair, and smash it into the Everton net via an arc of mesmerising beauty.

In a split second Garnacho stole Everton’s energy, blunted Goodison Park’s crusading power. Garnacho and United were suddenly the story, not Everton’s outrage over the points deduction for financial transgressions. Everton would have to tap into more mundane fuel to rescue the day. As valiantly as they laboured, United held out before pulling away.

Now Garnacho is compelled to repeat the trick in every match, beginning in Istanbul against Galatasaray on Wednesday. Impossible of course. But that’s okay.

What United need more than wonder goals is an upswing in the expected variety. United sit 10th in the Premier League’s expected goals (xG) metric, which in simple terms is a measure of quality of chances created.

United’s victory at Everton was their first in the Premier League this season by more than one goal. Despite scoring three times without reply United remain one of only two teams in the top 10 without a positive goal difference.

Garnacho snatched at an easier chance in the second half, that more accurately summarised United’s disjointed patterns.

This, and other historical examples, prompted skipper Bruno Fernandes to remind Garnacho of the need to contribute consistently rather than deliver in peaks and troughs. The point was well made and repeated similar counsel by Fernandes to Garnacho since the Argentine supernova broke through.

It also demonstrated a feature of Fernandes’ captaincy overlooked in the recent rush to bin him for his wearisome displays of petulance and frustration. For all his faults Fernandes sees the bigger picture. Perhaps he cares too deeply. He showed fine leadership too in presenting Marcus Rashford with the ball for the penalty, which was brilliantly dispatched.

While Roy Keane saw this an act of virtue signalling frivolity, putting at risk a victory at a critical juncture, others saw it as exemplary generalship, seeing an opportunity to bolster the belief of a player negotiating a confidence crisis. Rashford looked a different player in the final half hour as a result.

Keane’s leadership model has application across a smaller spectrum since it takes little account of personality type. Rashford would have wilted in Keane’s team. With Fernandes behind him, he has a chance to rise, just as he has with England in the restorative arms of Gareth Southgate.

Rashford’s one-match ban for the red card in Copenhagen adds a further loading upon Garnacho in Istanbul. However, United’s prospects perhaps rest more with 18-year-old Kobbie Mainoo, whose first Premier League start turned heads at Goodison Park.

Mainoo’s revelatory display was conditioned to a degree by the absence for so long of a player of that authority at the base of United’s midfield.

Erik ten Hag thought he had it with Casemiro until the ageing Brazilian ran out of gas towards the end of last season. Sofyan Amrabat hints at progress but delivers only episodically.

Mainoo has the aura of a player 10 years his senior, recycling the ball with ease, breaking through the lines, initiating attacks, snuffing out danger.

The victory over Everton differed from recent performances only by degree. As Ten Hag acknowledged Everton controlled the tempo in the first half.

Though United improved in the second, they lacked composure in key moments, surrendered possession too frequently and presented Everton with too many free runs at their defence.

At Goodison Park the goals went in. Had they not we might easily be talking again about Ten Hag’s replacement. He is still unable to evince from his players the game he wants to see.

United appear close to eureka moments but are just too brittle to carry his vision through with the necessary conviction. Across town, City continue to do Pep’s work. The impressive cohesion and liquid movement results entirely from players conditioned to work harder, run faster and dig deeper, for the love of their leader.

Jurgen Klopp is another with guru power. Mikel Arteta thinks he has it. Roberto De Zerbi, too.

The atmosphere around Ten Hag is poor. United need to plug into something in Istanbul to stay in the Champions League.

They will take another worldie from Garnacho, but, as Fernandes sagely advised, sometimes you have to take the mundane route. Tap-ins will do.



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PARIS — Newcastle United fans have been advised to “stick together” after a group of masked Paris Saint-Germain ultras attacked a bar where travelling supporters were drinking the night before the two clubs met in the Champions League.

Video circulated on social media on Monday night of PSG fans dressed in black clothing trying to get into a bar where Newcastle fans were congregating and brief skirmishes, with a window broken.

Visiting fans who were present at the bar told i it was “completely unprovoked”.

The incident took place at a bar in the Boulogne-Billancourt suburb after local police asked the Corcoran’s Irish pub, where more than 1,000 Newcastle fans were meeting in a ticketed event earlier in the evening, to shut at around 10pm for fear of clashes with local supporters.

A group of around 30 PSG fans then turned up at the nearby Cafe Seguin, proceeded to throw a flare and chairs at the windows and doors of the bar before moving on.

A representative of the Newcastle United Supporters Club who was present told i there were no injuries. It appeared to be an isolated incident and the NUSC said videos “made it look worse than it was”.

It will, however, raise tensions before a crucial game on Tuesday night which Newcastle need to avoid defeat in to stay in the Champions League. i has contacted the club for comment.

Fans are now being warned to be vigilant before the match itself, with the NUSC telling fans to “stick together and look after each other” in the run-up to Tuesday evening’s game.

The club issued advice earlier this month for fans to get to the ground at least an hour before kick off and “strongly advising” them to avoid the Auteuil suburb of the city.

Newcastle fan Eddie McKay was hospitalised after being stabbed in Milan in September.



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One minute he’s living in a caravan at the training ground, the next he’s in your ear insisting that changing your bedsheets can be the difference between winning and losing.

On other occasions, Sir Dave Brailsford disappears into the shadows or can even seem completely disinterested. But he is always watching.

These are the testimonies from the world of cycling about the Team Sky mastermind who will soon embark on his greatest challenge yet – rousing Manchester United from long-term slumber.

But how is a cycling coach, even one who has helped win 18 Olympic gold medals and 12 grand tour victories including six Tour de France titles, going to help a dysfunctional football club?

Many United supporters scoffed upon discovering he was to be part of Sir Jim Ratcliffe’s three-person football committee tasked with revolutionising their club.

Critics pointed to the only other high-profile example of a successful coach switching codes to football: England’s Rugby World Cup-winning leader Sir Clive Woodward and his disastrous attempts to translate his knowledge to the Premier League with Southampton in 2005.

But those who know Brailsford best insist things will be different for the man known for his marginal gains philosophy.

“In the late 1990s, when we set up British Cycling as we know it now, the aim was Olympic success, given we had achieved barely any,” Brian Cookson, former president of British Cycling and the Union Cycliste Internationale (UCI) tells i.

“We needed someone to procure the best kit and equipment and the name Dave Brailsford, from Planet X bikes, came up and he was brought in to do some deals. It soon became apparent that was underusing his abilities.

“He started to help performance director Peter Keen to manage the programmes and even hiring and firing. He also dealt with the media, right away. When Peter left, there was only one guy for the job really. His attitude was ‘give me Peter’s job, I can come in and do even better’. And he did, in fairness.”

When handed the reins as performance director in 2003, Brailsford, and cycling in this country, never looked back.

The Olympic medal tally went from global embarrassment to a river of gold quickly after the 2008 and 2012 games, propelling Brailsford into the limelight – a place he was more than comfortable in.

“Among his many strengths was he was very, very good at selling, especially selling Dave Brailsford,” Cookson adds.

CANNES, FRANCE - JUNE 23: Sir Dave Brailsford speaks on stage during the Dentsu Aegis Network seminar as part of the Cannes Lions International Festival of Creativity on June 23, 2015 in Cannes, France. (Photo by Francois G. Durand/Getty Images)
Brailsford is best known for his successful stint as team principal at Team Sky (Photo: Getty)

His Olympic success soon transferred to the road as he became team principal at Team Sky, where he oversaw an astonishing six Tour de France wins between 2012 and 2018 for Sir Bradley Wiggins, Chris Froome and Geraint Thomas.

But it was how he went about things, with his innovative thinking, that really started to turn heads.

“He brought in a swimming coach to work with his team, and the cycling world was like ‘what the hell?’,” Team Jumbo-Visma chief executive Richard Plugge tells i. “It was a disaster for cycling, everyone was like ‘what does swimming have to do with cycling?’ He just brought a different way of thinking. He is really good at that. We have to remember, when he started with British Cycling he was not a cyclist. He didn’t know that much about cycling.

“I hated watching his team beat us all the time, but always with the greatest respect. He did it in a way I could not have dreamt at the time. Now we have taken on board all that and have used it to our advantage.

“So many laughed, and that is what I think I admire about him most. I am sure he will be able to do it in other sports, like football.”

Such traits should be music to the ears of even the most sceptical United fans. For too long, big decisions have been taken by ill-placed figures in roles their skillset did not suit, the most obvious example being chartered accountant Ed Woodward being entrusted with the company credit card in the transfer market. The results speak for themselves.

Brailsford has taken the opposite approach. He knows what he is good at, but admits it when he is incapable in other areas.

“Shane Sutton, Dr Steve Peters – Dave finds these people,” Cookson continues. “It was all about the mix of people. Nobody has before or since been able to get that right like Dave did. You’d have some top physiologist, you’d have a really good nutritionist, the guy in charge of all the bikes and the technology and all that sort of thing with Chris Boardman. You’d then have Peters with the Chimp Paradox thing concentrating on emotions.

“On the other end of the scale, you’d have Shane, the sergeant major in the group, who would be like ‘what the f**k are you talking about? Get on the f**king bike and press harder on the f**king pedals’. It just all came together.”

The whole approach, however, revolved around one theme, something that became so entrenched in the zeitgeist it has been adopted by businesses in all fields looking to find an edge over their rivals.

Wiggins, perhaps like many sick of hearing the term marginal gains, labelled it a “load of rubbish”. For others, however, the philosophy, which covers anything from insisting upon hypoallergenic sleeping linen to bringing along his own food truck (because five-star hotels weren’t good enough for his cyclists) has stuck.

“Marginal gains in itself is a maximum gain,” says Team Sky rider Alex Dowsett, author of Bloody Minded: My Life in Cycling, about his career managing haemophilia. “There’s no one big thing, certainly in this era of cycling that’s going to win you races, so you have to focus on all the little stuff. You have to look at your competitors and what can I do? Half a per cent better. And if we can find 10 half a per cents that’s massive.

“The talent that I think Dave had was to look at all of those things and question every single one. Then rewrite the rulebook. Pro cycling was quite an intimidating place with lots of old boys who would sort of point fingers and laugh at the new kid on the block trying to do things differently. He just rewrote the traditions of pro cycling. The stuff that is bread and butter of modern cycling, like putting on a skinsuit for a road race, that was him.”

“I’m not actually sure that he invented the phrase marginal gains,” Cookson admits, however. “I’m almost sure that Peter Keen was the first one to come up with that. I might be wrong but that is another thing he is so good at – taking something, running with it, developing it and delivering it.”

For everything he has achieved with marginal gains, there is always a dark cloud hanging over Brailsford and his methods.

Everything centres around a mysterious jiffy bag delivered from British Cycling to Team Sky at the end of the Criterium du Dauphine in 2011, leading to allegations of doping. After five years of simmering speculation, Brailsford said he was told by now ex-British Cycling doctor Richard Freeman that the package contained the decongestant fluimucil. Freeman, however, didn’t have the medical records to prove so.

MONACO, MONACO - SEPTEMBER 22: Ineos Sport CEO Jean-Claude Blanc, Ineos Sports Director Dave Brailsford and Ineos CEO and owner of OGC Nice Jim Ratcliffe celebrate Nice victory on the pitch following the Ligue 1 Uber Eats match between AS Monaco (ASM) and OGC Nice (OGCN) at Stade Louis II on September 22, 2023 in Monaco, Monaco. (Photo by Jean Catuffe/Getty Images)
His innovative thinking has won him plenty of admirers (Photo: Getty)

Following a UK Anti-Doping (Ukad) investigation in 2017, no doping charges were brought against Team Sky or British Cycling, but the select committee report still concluded that Team Sky had “crossed an ethical line” in relation to “therapeutic use exemptions” generally.

While he has always denied any wrongdoing, having set out to help rid the sport of doping – something that for long periods was endemic in cycling – he may never be able to escape suspicion.

His management style, in the eyes of some, is also far from perfect.

“I think one criticism I would have is there was never anything direct from Dave to say ‘well done’ or ‘you did a good job’,” Dowsett adds.

“I remember in my first year at Team Sky, in the Tour of Britain, I’d won the TT [time trial] on the final day and [coach] Sean Yates said to me ‘you’ve single-handedly saved Team Sky’s second most important race after the Tour de France by winning the time trial, well done’. Nothing at all from Dave. Not a word.”

“It wasn’t as smooth as it might appear,” Cookson adds. “At times we weren’t too sure whether he was the right man for the job. I mean, there were some clashes with some riders and sprint squads.

“But every time that there was an issue in those early days, it was a case of do we back him or do we sack him. The results would inevitably come.”

Since leaving British Cycling behind to work for Ratcliffe’s Ineos and their portfolio of sporting entities, the Midas touch has certainly deserted him.

Ineos acquired French football club Nice in a €100m deal in 2018 and he has tried his hand at improving their fortunes, living in that trusted caravan at the training ground for long periods.

However they have so far fallen short of their target of competing in the Champions League, while the Ineos Grenadiers cycling team (formerly Team Sky) has not recently challenged for top honours.

Is he spreading himself too thin and his teams are suffering as a result?

For the man who helped set him on the path to cycling revolution, there is only one way he can have anything like the same effect on the stricken Manchester United as Ineos look to start winning again – go back to what a young, hungry Brailsford thrived on – taking control, his way.

“It’s a big challenge for anybody,” Cookson adds. “I think Dave will need the support of a lot of really good people to change the trajectory of Manchester United. In all the aspects the club appears to be underperforming.

“Dave is a good person to try to be able to do that, but a lot is going to revolve around whether he is given the resources, whether he’s allowed to recruit the right people and whether he gets to make decisions as well.

“He’s a good influencer as well as a good leader. At the end of the day, if you’ve got the ear of Jim Ratcliffe, one of the richest men in the world, he must still have it. It’s going to be a big ask. I would say it’s the biggest challenge of his professional life. He’ll need pretty substantial gains as well as marginal ones this time.”



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