Under pressure after a mini-stutter, nobody could have foreseen this massacre of the most epic proportions. Not even a man who had been there, done that before.
Seven different goalscorers got on the scoresheet as Old Trafford over-indulged, and some, with Manchester United plundering nine to match their biggest-ever Premier League win, set against Ipswich in 1995. Never in their 143-year existence, across all competitions, have United won by a greater margin.
Amid the glut of goals, however, the standout performance, surprisingly on this record-breaking evening, came from a full-back in the form of his life.
United, however, got more than a helping hand from a Saints side back in a dark place they never thought they would return to this soon after their last nine-goal trouncing.
Making your first-ever Premier League start as a teenager full of testosterone, it is easy to get carried away and charge around dazzled by the bright lights on the big stage.
Ralph Hasenhuttl may even have encouraged such vigour and enthusiasm in his pre-match match pep talk with Alexandre Jankewitz. But to then see his full debutant slice into Scott McTominay like a surgeon after just 77 seconds, the Austrian could only turn his back in exasperation, as he knew Mike Dean, one who relishes the spotlight, would waste no time in brandishing the red card.
You could feel the relief, once McTominay was back to his feet, around Old Trafford. All eyes were on United after recent laboured performances. Roy Keane, hardly set for an Indian summer as a diplomat, said United were ‘frightened’ of a title battle. Last night, however, against a shell-shocked Saints, it was time for this United side, who had scored just four goals in their last five league games, to let loose.
Relishing sticking it to his former employer was Luke Shaw. It has been a long road to this point for the much-maligned 25-year-old, but having worked back from a double leg break and a myriad of other fitness issues Shaw is now starting to fulfil the potential that persuaded United to make him the world’s most expensive teenager in 2014.
In the first half alone, Shaw registered two assists – as many as he had managed in his previous 45 Premier League appearances combined. He created five chances in the opening period in total, the most he had ever created in a match, with 45 minutes still to go.
Regular United watchers will tell you this type of impactful display has been in the air for a while. Shaw has gradually improved week on week especially going forward, with he and Aaron Wan-Bissaka finally giving United a threat from full-back they have been missing for so long.
The start of this season was the same old story. After United’s draw against Chelsea at the end of October, in nine appearances, Shaw and Wan-Bissaka had created five chances without registering a single assist. Aaron Cresswell, for West Ham, had created 13 chances on his own during the same period.
New signing Alex Telles was supposed to be the panacea with his wicked deliveries on his left foot. Instead, nothing needed fixing, as Shaw has kept Telles on the sidelines.
With the shackles off against the 10 men, it was always going to be a matter of time until United hit the goalscoring trail, the only surprise was who it was that kicked the floodgates open.
Shaw’s cross for Wan-Bissaka’s opener was sublime, and was the first time the pair had combined for a Premier League goal, before Shaw then sashayed through the Saints midfield like a slalom skier before crossing for Mason Greenwood, who centred for Marcus Rashford to make it two.
Rashford then turned provider with an arrowed cross possessing too much swerve for Jan Bednarek, who could only agonisingly put through his own net.
Shaw was not done there as he clipped another pearler on to the head of Edinson Cavani for a United fourth before half time.
With the job done, United allowed Saints to score what they thought was a consolation, only for VAR to rule it out, before Anthony Martial got a much-needed goal for his confidence, and a full recovered McTominay rifled home a sixth.
Remarkably, the drama was not over yet, as Dean pointed to the spot, sent Bednarek off for a foul on Martial after a lengthy VAR review, and Bruno Fernandes converted the penalty. The final two goals were simply bewildering.
The most puzzling thing about this most mind-boggling of evenings is that Man of the Match, in a 9-0 win, goes to a left-back. The Premier League is just getting weirder by the week.
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