The “White and Jordan” show on Talksport has a format and you cannot doubt either its commitment to that format or its success.
Jim White is the presenter, whose principal role is to say something along the lines of “Hey, I’m just asking the questions here” on repeat while a famous caller, usually aiming for self-promotion, becomes a little unstuck. Simon Jordan is the entrance-fee (free) justification. To call Jordan someone with strong opinions would be like accusing Casanova of liking the odd romantic dalliance.
Did White and Jordan peak last Friday? Who knows. But it was certainly appointment radio (or appointment clip-listening, which is sort of the point of the exercise). As potential/hopeful Birmingham City owner Laurence Bassini claimed that he would “win the league” – to much audible scoffing – White’s face became an instant meme, as if someone had asked him to multiply 73 by 271 while eating a lemon covered in chilli powder.
We only really have Bassini’s word for the progress of his takeover, and you can choose to take that with as much salt as you like. But we do know that his exclusivity period has expired and that the EFL has clarified that “it is not currently in receipt of documentation from any individual regarding acquisition of control at Birmingham City”. Actions – who knows. Words – probably too many, on reflection.
Amid this operatic performance, dirty washing repeatedly aired in the baking sun, it’s easy to overlook that the future of a Championship club lies at stake here. Whether or not Bassini is acting upon delusion or determination is unclear; the only certain truth is that Birmingham City supporters need answers and need them quickly.
Birmingham’s last decade has been a tale of extreme economic discomfort, a battle against the crippling impacts of relegation and mismanagement. A non-exhaustive potted history: then-owner Carson Yeung was sentenced to six years in prison for money laundering in 2014, new owners Trillion Trophy Asia stepped forward (that name now appears slightly ambitious); Birmingham became the first Championship club to suffer a points deduction for breaching FFP spending limits; the club sold its stadium to a company registered in the British Virgin Islands to raise capital but are now obliged to pay an annual rent; sections of the stadium were closed due to structural issues.
The latest accounts, released last month, make for bleak reading (although they have company in the Championship there). Losses were down (although they stand at £90m over the last nine years, including the stadium sale) but were eased by Jude Bellingham’s departure to Dortmund – there are few jewels left to sell. Birmingham had the third highest wage-turnover ratio in the Championship, spending £230 on wages for every £100 earned. Gross debt fell slightly to £123m, £20m of which has been transferred by the club’s parent company to a related third party.
All this might be feasible if Birmingham were competing at the division’s top end or had a definite ownership future. Brentford had an eye-watering wage-turnover ratio when they got promoted. Nottingham Forest consistently posted operating losses. Stoke have more gross debt to their owners – but the Coates family are long-termers.
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This summer, Lee Bowyer has been sacked and replaced with John Esutace. Eustace must turn around the fortunes of a team that won only four Championship matches after the end of November last season. If that wasn’t hard enough, players have left St Andrew’s this summer who accounted for 36 per cent of the club’s league starts last season (184 of 506 total starts). The only new arrival so far is Przemysław Płacheta on loan from Norwich City.
Birmingham fans are not asking for much. They understand that their time in the sun, of domestic cup success, European football and Premier League consolidation, are now a pipe dream, grim reality reinforced by circumstance. But they are sick of beginning each campaign with a low ceiling and without an obvious floor on their performance.
Pre-season is supposed to be a time of anticipation, of new beginnings and new hope. Few amongst Birmingham City supporters are excited about what might follow next. Winning the league? They would take just staying in it for another year.
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