Neco Williams wears a ring on his right hand. You may notice it when Nottingham Forest play Fulham on Saturday, albeit covered with the mandatory white tape, and though a present from his partner it is actually a token to remember his grandad, Kelvin Jones, who passed away last year.
“Everything I do on the pitch is for him,” Williams tells i, when showing the ring which has the years 1948 and 2022 engraved on it. “He played a massive part in my football career. That’s probably who I got my ability from, because my dad and mum can’t play.”
Rarely are the passings of footballers’ grandparents reported, but Williams’ loss in November was an exception. A tearful look down the camera and audible “that was for you, grandad” after Wales’ draw with USA told us briefly of the turmoil he had endured while out in Qatar, as did the subsequent social media post where he spoke of “crying all day” in the lead-up to their World Cup opener.
And sitting down at Nottingham Forest’s training ground with i less than three months later, Williams speaks with a sincerity that belies his 21 years when reflecting on those blurry 24 hours, when the biggest match of his career followed the toughest loss of his life.
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“As soon as they landed, they came straight to the hotel and told me the news. I’ve never really lost someone close to me until then. I remember from the time they told me literally up until the game, I was in shock, crying, just in a bit of a blur.
“Warming up I could see my family there on the front row. It was tough knowing what they were thinking and going through, but I knew I had to focus on the game. We managed to get a draw, and I’ll always dedicate that game to him for many different reasons.
“The message my family always said to me was I had to play the game because that’s what he would have wanted. He wouldn’t have wanted me to miss the game for that reason. He would have 100 per cent wanted me to play, and that was my motivation, to play it for him.”
The passing was unexpected, with Williams’ granddad suffering a heart attack after an evening at the pub with friends. “That’s what threw us off so much,” Williams adds. “To hear that was obviously devastating, but a big credit to my team-mates, they played a big part getting around me and taking my mind off it.
“The whole tournament felt like a blur. From finding out the passing of my granddad, to a week later getting concussion. I can say that tournament was probably the toughest test I’ve had to have in my career so far, but it’s just nice to have that support of all your friends and team-mates. I felt overwhelmed and it was nice to hear that people do care about you and have you back, see if you are okay.”
"That was for you grandad"
— ITV Football (@itvfootball) November 21, 2022
An emotional moment post-match for @necowilliams01 as he pays tribute to his late grandfather#ArBenYByd | #FIFAWorldCup | #TogetherStronger pic.twitter.com/Smv8sFcpme
Having lost my partner to cancer in November, words that look as surreal typed out as they sound in my head, what resonated with me about Williams – and was the core reason for reaching out – was the fact he went back to work the following day.
Those grappling with grief while attempting to work can attest to the internal conflict that plays out in your increasingly muddled mind. Yes, work provides structure, but it also spearheads this ongoing battle between bereavement and trying to give “normal” life a go. When these elements collide it makes for a concoction of confusion and guilt.
It is no different for footballers. Sure, this is the dream, this isn’t the daily grind and is a far cry from the 9-to-5 lifestyle. They are able to dedicate games and goals to lost loved ones in a way we wouldn’t dedicate emails or team meetings, but that does not make their personal issues any less meaningful, and so it remains a juggling act for them too, especially as this global, most-watched, multi-billion sport comes with its own unique pressures.
Antonio Conte put it mildly when recently opening up about a “not simple” period personally, in which the Tottenham boss lost three friends: Gian Piero Ventrone, Sinisa Mihajlovic and Gianluca Vialli. Last year, Cristiano Ronaldo was back playing for Manchester United five days after announcing the death of his newborn son, while Marcus Rashford dedicated his World Cup goal in England’s win over Wales to a friend who had passed away just days before.
Williams is not alone, therefore, in working through the grief in this high-pressure industry.
“I think people do forget footballers are just normal human beings,” says Williams. “We don’t have superpowers. We have literally the same feelings and emotions to every single person in the world.
“People sometimes forget how hard it may be, especially to play after losing someone you loved, where there’s still so much pressure on you to win the game, and you’re also playing on the biggest stage in the world where millions of people are going to be watching.
“So many players have mental health issues and do have problems, but the public don’t see that. Then if they’re not performing or are away from training, the public think ‘he’s not doing this, he’s not doing that’ and give him abuse, but they don’t know the insides of our lives. Just because they think footballers have money and the best life in the world, it is not like that at all. We still have problems that everyone in the world has.”
Williams speaks with fierce admiration for his grandad Kelvin, who followed him around the world from Sweden to Singapore but was also his biggest critic and would call up after games to point out areas for improvement. “He didn’t want me to get comfortable, he always said I had to get better and better,” Williams adds. “When I was younger, I used to hate listening to him when I had a game because I knew whatever I did, it wouldn’t be good enough. He would always push me on to do better and better, and that’s 100 per cent helped me to where I am now.”
Although a “strange feeling” these phone calls are no more, Williams can still hear his grandad, particularly in the moments he should have used his other foot. The result of this is a versatility that saw Williams play right-back then left wing in last weekend’s win over Leeds, and has helped him rack up 26 appearances in a season where manager Steve Cooper has plenty of options.
Williams was one of 21 summer signings for Forest. Another eight joined in January. With a smile, he joked the squad were already “getting used” to it when three-time Champions League winner Keylor Navas walked through the door on deadline day, never mind when free agent Andre Ayew made it 30 incomings for the season two days later.
And while this recruitment drive has been the source of derision away from the club, on the inside things are starting to click. The memories of Cooper’s job being under threat have faded, with Forest now 13th in the table.
“It’s a step in the right direction, and you’ve probably seen a few videos on social media of us all dancing. That’s just the team spirit that we need,” he says. “The start of the season was tough, because no one knew each other, but now the manager has got the boys really together, not just on the pitch, but off the pitch as well.”
What of Wrexham, then, where Williams was born and raised? An FA Cup meeting with Tottenham may have evaded the non-league side, but with promotion a distinct possibility under their Hollywood owners, plenty of heads are turning.
So too is Williams’, albeit many years from now if his hometown club ever make the Premier League. “Save me a space in the team,” he says. “I’d love that if Wrexham got to the Premier League, I think I’d be straight there.
“Everyone in football is interested in Wrexham because of what they’ve done. The only way is up and up, hopefully they can get out of that league because they’ve been there for way too long.”
But for now, this 21-year-old – already with Champions League, Premier League, World Cup and European Championship experience, plus promotion with Fulham last season – is focused on being the best version of himself, as his grandad would have wanted.
“For a 21-year-old I think that’s quite a lot of experience,” he acknowledges, “but for me, that’s nowhere near where I want to be or where I want to be comfortable. I want to keep striving to do the best I can. I think I’ve got a lot of time, a lot of years to keep doing what I’m doing and to keep improving. And that’s what my grandad would keep saying to me.
“Once you stop improving, you’re only going to go down and down. You have to keep on improving every single day. That’s why I feel like I just have to always do if I want to be the best footballer I can be. I need to work on my weaknesses. I need to master what I’m good at. And yeah, and that’s just improving, improving.”
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